Riding the Roller Coaster

by | Jun 1, 2009 | family

I almost have to laugh at myself this evening…I’ve been thinking about our weekend for the last few minutes and I’m realizing what an emotional roller coaster I’ve ridden on this weekend! I have cried more this weekend, and also laughed more this weekend, than I remember doing so for a very long time! Some say women are emotional? I’m proof of that the last two days…

The highlights:
Friday evening I did some organizing of pictures in my files in my computer. Going through the pictures brought up so many memories which then brought both smiles and tears! Pat, Stacie and Bennett stopped by for some snacks and drinks. Pat and Stacie ALWAYS make me laugh and watching two episodes of Happy Days added to our laughter!

Yesterday I think my problem was that I had too much time on my hands to THINK. My mind was all over the place…kids, Ali driving, Zach’s soccer, things to get done at home, feeling overwhelmed, falling short in my monthly goals, family schedules, summer schedules, work, friends, flower beds, falling short in exercise and eating right this week, falling short in relationships, finding time to get everything done, our mailbox being bashed in from the night before, graduation parties, church, etc, etc, etc! That was just SOME of what was going through my mind yesterday! UGH! What’s that scripture?…Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

After picking up Ali from Driver’s Ed, she and I met Bill and Zach, who were just coming from a soccer game 1-1/2 hours away. We went to my cousin, Alex’s graduation party. Talk about fun! It was so great to see so many of my Dad’s side of the family, especially my cousins whom I haven’t seen since probably Mom’s funeral 2-1/2 years ago!

One of my favorite people, whom I don’t get to see very often, is my cousin Merri Chris. For years people have said that I am so much like her, and especially after yesterday, I would agree! I enjoyed catching up with her!

Pat and I were surprised that our high school Spanish teacher, Trudy, was at this graduation party also! She also taught Alex at her high school!

Ali drove home (of course) from the graduation party, and by this time my emotions were starting to get the best of me. I miss not seeing this side of our family as often…especially since Mom and Dad are gone. My cousins, Tom and Jerry, reminded me a few times of Dad as I watched their mannerisms and their expressions. I really began to miss Dad! Our drive home was unusually quiet.

And then came church this morning…I wasn’t prepared for it. A couple from another part of the state came to the Mission and shared their story. They were blessed with six children. Five years ago, four of their children were in a car accident a half-mile away from their rural home, and two of them died at the scene of the accident–two boys ages 14 and 11. This was a HUGE reality check for me! They spoke on grief and taught on 1 Thessalonians 4:13 about grieving and having hope. It was all over for me…the floodgates opened and tears began to flow and flow and flow.

Kleenex after kleenex, and I knew my makeup efforts this morning were entirely in vain. I really lost it when they asked those who needed prayer who were grieving to stand up to be prayed for…I stood and then felt two hands on my back reaching out to me and praying for me. I was shocked when the prayer was done and I looked to see who was touching me…those two hands were Ali’s and Grace’s (Tina’s oldest daughter)! I was an emotional mess!

Ali and Zach were picking on each other in the backseat on the way home, and I had absolutely NO patience at this point. I really had to hold my tongue, otherwise I would have said things that were welling up inside of me out of my emotions. I think Bill knew I was about to “lose it” so he gave the kids “the look.” That ended their scuffle in the back seat. 🙂

I did my best to touch-up my makeup when we got home and to put myself back together. Within 20 minutes, we were back on the road again to Zach’s last soccer game for this season. Watching him and his team took my mind off of all the emotional stuff I was going through. It was the best thing I could have done for me. Zach played well, and this “soccer Mom” was completely proud of her son! He brought a number of smiles to my face!


Needless to say, I’m emotionally exhausted this evening! I’m going to turn in early tonight and pray that tomorrow will be a fresh new day! It’s no wonder why I don’t care for roller coasters anymore, especially the emotional kind! 🙂

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Julie Lefebure
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